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Excerpt 10

Comment in answer to question of magick types - whether white/black or good/evil:

In my own personal viewpoints on the subject, I see either Ego or Non-Ego based paths. Much talk has been made around various circles of 'left' 'right' and 'Middle' paths (in reference to the Tree of Life) and that probably comes a little closer to my views here. I'm more of a 'Middle Pillar' sorta guy myself.

In my observation, there are some practitioners who do things for the purpose of achieving their ego-driven goals and pandering to the whims of their human egos/personalities while caring nothing for personal spiritual evolution and the raising of consciousness. Such is the practice of what's often referred to as 'low' or 'lesser' magick (according to the definitions I was taught and make use of). On the opposite end of the spectrum, some practitioners work for their own spiritual evolution and care nothing for the whims of an impoverished and misguided ego. This is 'high' magick. Those latter types of people follow the guidance and direction of their higher true spiritual essence (the 'higher-self' or the H.G.A. etc). That's not to say they don't do things for their own benefit. Those practitioners are merely in contact with their true essence and submit to the true Will of their spiritual aspects rather than following casual desires/whims of the lower 'human' psyche (which is in itself a created thing). From having worked previously as an ego-driven idiot myself, I have to say that submitting to the Will of my higher nature has been far more rewarding and educational.

Here are some of my own thoughts on the ego:

The human psyche is a multi-faceted structure existing simultaneously on many levels or frequencies of manifestation. It can be metaphorically compared to a plant, such as a flower, in structure. The most obvious part of a flower is, of course, the showy petals on the top or outside. That is like the human ego or 'lower personality' as it is sometimes called. Often we mistake those showy portions to be the actual plant in its entirety or as the parts of most importance while forgetting the ever-vital roots of the flower. It is from the roots that life springs forth and allows the showy flower sections to exist. Those roots can be compared to one's higher-self, higher spiritual aspects, or true Essence (the core of your Being that most people are not conscious of). And even the roots of the plant draw upon a source beyond themselves such as the Earth and the Sky. Those other sources beyond the root or essence can be compared to the Point Source from which all things come or the 'All' (in Qabalistic terminology), Brahma, Nu, 'God', or the Great Spirit, depending on your philosophical and religious leanings.

When I perform magick, I prefer to draw upon divine sources; the same sources from which all life originally comes forth (by whatever names or deities one associates with it). I compare this to the act of going to the source of a river rather than drawing water from the potentially polluted areas near its termination. To me it just 'feels' right. And I suppose that's all that really matters for my purposes. In the process of learning to do that, I've had to let go of most of my petty concerns and self-imposed limitations that were created by ego-based behavior (and I'm STILL learning to do this - as I said before, no one is perfect and I'm certainly no exception). The ego, in reality, is just a description of who you think you are, created over time by the affirmations of oneself and others. Knowing this, the ego is shown to be what it truly is; a big bunch of self-important Nothing. Although it may have been nothing, it would've had me believe that it was an all-important Something in an effort to continue to exist and subvert the Will of the spirit. What I'm aluding to indirectly here is the ancient process of becoming the true self. The Alchemists made reference to such a process of refinement and combining of upper and lower portions in an effort to become a third and new thing (see references in Alchemy such as 'the Philosophers Stone' ). The later occultists and magickians describe the process as the 'Great Work' - the union of higher and lower portions of the psyche. The Qabalists discuss a mystical marriage and still others talk about 'knowledge and conversation of the holy guardian angel'. They're all talking about the same thing here, and this is the basis of my own practices and of the information on this site. I don't view the 'higher-self' as a separate entity, because it isn't. It's a portion of awareness that most people aren't normally conscious of, and the root or essence from which all lower aspects of manifestation within an individual (including the human personality) spring forth. The only way I've found to work with it successfully is through the total submission of the lower ego to the will of the higher portions, thus fully integrating oneself as a tool of the spirit at first, and then becoming the 'true self' over time. Some think they can conquer the higher self and make it do their bidding, but this is just not possible. That would be like the flower believing itself to be a 'god' and trying to cut its roots and go off on its own; it would surely wither and die with the loss of its life-giving source.