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Excerpt 47

From e-list posting August 13th 2003


> > I feel for you, I honestly do, but there are some things that I'll
> > just say rather quickly and bluntly as I'm short on time. Please
> try
> > not to take them too personally - my aim is not to harm
> > senselessly,
> > but to motivate out of compassion and concern:
> >
> > 1. While reading the helpless tone of your message I at first
> thought
> > it was written by someone who was neither old nor mature enough to
> > take matters into his own hands. I was rather shocked to see that
> > your profile listed 23 as your age. You may wish to think about
> that.

> Well battle scarred, from years of bullying at school....... AND from
> finding stuff missing that means something to me (soon as I get some
> confidence, you can always guarantee someone will **** things up, and
> kick me right back down again).

That's the Principle of Rhythm (see the Kybalion) - there's nothing you can do about the natural swing from winning to losing and back to winning again, but there's plenty you can do to change the way you handle it as well as your overall outlook on the endless, necessary, and Educational process of it. Staying negative and without hope won't get you anywhere.

> > 2. Were the bits and pieces from your mother being kept in YOUR
> > room/area? If so, then what the hell was your father doing in there
> > in the first place (especially since you're 23)?

> The stuff taken in this instance were taken from the dinette (small
> dining room), which has been practically my room (+ my Mums) for the
> 4years now I've had PC's and the Internet at home.

> > 3. Given your age, why are you still living with your father and/or
> > allowing him into your room/area? (You needn't answer this
> > on-list - the question is only meant to generate personal reflection.)

> You ain't seen the prices of Houses round here...... minimum rent
> £350 a month usually, and a pissy little 1 bedroom flat (which would
> be too small for me and my stuff anyway) costs well over £80,000...

£350 is roughly equal to $856 AU. That comes out to only around $214 AU a week - man I'd LOVE to have rent THAT CHEAP! In Sydney we're currently paying the equivalent of around £522 a month for a 2 bedroom apartment. (Hmmm looks like you're not getting any sympathy in the financial department yet.)

Regarding the 1 bedroom flat, £80,000 is roughly equivalent to only $195,000 AU. One bedroom apartments in Sydney have been running up as high as $400,000 AU to buy lately in some areas, so you're still not getting much sympathy from me as far as money is concerned.

> wages here are usually lower than the minimum you need to get the
> size of mortgage required. This is basically due to a popular TV
> series called "Heartbeat" being filmed here..... so people from
> elsewhere in the country buy up the houses for Holiday homes that
> they only use a couple of weeks a year then clear off.
> The area has also been used in a few big Hollywood movies, including
> the first 2 HARRY POTTER films.......... and also has connections
> with Captain Cook (who discovered Australia) and Bram Stoker's
> Dracula novel....... so the place also gets invaded twice a year for
> GOTH weekend.

You sound like a version of me from several years ago while in the depths of something called "Learned Helplessness." (Look it up in any good text on Psychology.) The solution for me was to start spending time in new environments so that I would be forced to not rely on old past negative self-programming. Environments where old mental programs (habits/ways of processing and interpreting my surroundings) were unusable tended to be the most beneficial for me since I was required to ignore those past programs and invent new ones in order to cope with the demands of the new environment(s). In your case, I'd say get yourself a simple crap job at the local Scrotum Burger, save up some cash, and move into an apartment with a few friends for a while - preferably on the other side of the country, or even in a different country. It's possible to do this if you accept the possibility and seek out the opportunities. (Do some reading on NLP to help rid your self of those debilitating neg. self-programs first though.)

I was once in a destitute financial position while living in the middle of a rural area with a high unemployment rate. I now live on the other side of the world from where I started, and I'm MUCH happier.

Note from May 2005: The move was not without incident. I've had to go through a lot of personal and social upheaval, nearly driving myself insane (yet again) as a result of old issues (thought to be either dead or non-existent) being drudged up from the depths of the past and having to work through a series of problems related to living conditions and their physical and mental effects on me. This hell took about a year and a half to get through. It just goes to show that nothing is without its price.

If I can do it, then so can you. Develop your force of will, tell yourself you can do anything you set your mind to, and if you keep trying, you will figure out how. Don't expect any practice of magick to work unless that initial foundation of a strong Will and a positive mental outlook are in place, however. Hmm for that matter, don't expect anything in life to be effective or enjoyable unless you've succeeded in reprogramming your head. You'd be surprised how much the world can change around you (i.e. your perception of the world as well as how people react to you) just by changing the way your INSIDES work first.